A real success, and it’s full of hot men in revealing clothes, so what more could you want?

Of course, when I speak of success, it’s within the limits of the big-budget 150-minute peplum that I’d never ever would have wanted to see in a theater (by the way, I really need to buy a set-top DVD player, as you can’t do something else at the same time as you’re watching a longish or mediocre movie on your PC).

And, when I speak of hot men, I’m not only about Brad, because even Orlando Bloom manages to be sexy, from all the preperation work for his poor little fight scene. Well, he still looks and sounds like a naive teenager, but at least it’s just right for the part this time.

Finally, when I speak of revealing clothes… let’s just say the director is so in love with Brad Pitt’s butt (and who could blame him?) that he’d make Achilles fight nude if he could. If you fast-forward through the batlle scenes (which isn’t really necessary: it’s pretty well balanced for an epic movie), you get a Chippendales gay movie. Well, except for the fact that Achilles fucks girls by the threes so that moviegoers don’t figure Patroclus is his life partner if they don’t want to. Actually, that’s very gay too — 1950s, Ben-Hur gay.